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- #30: special enough to matter
⭐ Gold star seeking
In the moments of stillness before sleep, when the hustle and bustle of your day has come to a close and you’ve set your phone down to charge, you might feel it:
an invisible weight pressing down on your chest,
a soft voice whispering you’re not there yet.
You might keep meticulous records of your perceived shortcomings, replaying them like a nightly audit, while filing your wins neatly away in a drawer labeled “not yet enough.”
Maybe, like me, you’ve spent years collecting gold stars – degrees, accolades, job titles – believing that if you just achieved enough, you’d finally feel more than a fleeting sensation of wholeness.
But maybe every shiny milestone that you believed would quiet that voice, confusingly, seemed to amplify it.
The truth is, as long as your worth is tied to achievement, “enough” will always feel just ever so slightly out of reach.
The paradox of gold-star seeking is this: the harder we try to prove our worth to others (and inevitably, to ourselves), the less secure in it we feel.
What, then, does create a sustainable sense of self-worth? What does it mean to be truly confident?
⭐ Last week on The Well Path
On last week’s episode of The Well Path, I sat down with Amanda Baudier – a spiritual mentor and executive coach – to talk about what it really means to “succeed” in life, how to tap into a deeper well for self-worth, and the importance of spiritual autonomy in creating a life you love to live in.
Amanda’s story is one of radical redefinition: from a high-powered hospitality career in NYC, to burning out so severely that she required emergency heart surgery at age 28.
She rebuilt her life not by becoming more of anything, but by learning how to truly be who she came here to be.
Together, we explored:
🌿 The illusion of exceptionalism and how it keeps us disconnected from our true purpose
🌿 Differentiating external vs. internal validation and why most of us confuse the two
🌿 Nervous system regulation tools for grounding and clarity
🌿 The benefits and pitfalls of plant medicine and how to know if it’s right for you
This episode is for you if:
✨ You tend to tie your identity to achievements/accolades
✨ You have experienced certain successes but it never quite feels like enough
✨ You’re craving a deeper, more grounded sense of confidence
✨ You are in a period of questioning and redefining your beliefs, goals and purpose
💭 Go deeper
A few journal prompts to think/write on this week:
Where in my life and I still trying to EARN or PROVE my worth? Explore the spaces where you seek approval, achievement, or external validation in order to feel “good enough.”
What parts of myself do I dim or edit to be more acceptable to others? In this week’s episode, Amanda references Gabor Mate’s insights on the choice between authenticity and belonging. Some situations, especially early on in life, require us to shapeshift in order to access belonging. As an adult, you can start to shift your focus toward authenticity—which in turn becomes the foundation for belonging to the right people.
That’s all for now. Thank you so much for being here.
Love, Brooke
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